"The primordial woman", the wild woman, or the "authentic feminine" is like a wheel with many different aspects. Some of these aspects have been exalted and put on piedestals by our society through history. Especially the Holy Virgin, the all loving embracing mother aspect, where other aspects have been demonized; the dark, powerful, wild and sexual aspects. But they are a complete package, which together creates a whole, just like the year has 4 seasons and you can't cut out one season, because then the rest won't be the same. They are what they are by virtue of each other, and in the same way a woman will feel an internal pressure, when pieces of her wholeness are not permitted to be expressed in her life.
Throughout times women have been burned at the stake, been bullied for being women, pursued, deprived of their rights, abused, made into the man's slaves, sexually abused and raped without being able to do anything about it, shamed and punished for pregnancy outside marriage, forced to live in powerty and raise children alone. The list is long when it comes to the sufferings that women have had to endure the last thousands of years.
Women had to adapt into very tiny places, and into a very limited role to be permitted to live, and have a place in a world where men were the sole dominaters. And the women who didn't adapt were exterminated, tortured, expelled or exposed to horrible things. This still lies deep within women's dna.
This is not written to blame or victimize anyone, because men and women were on both sides. It is just a fact, and we are still dealing with the consequences and the aftermath of it.
"And when a woman finally gave into the amputation of vital parts of herself - the amputation of her psyche, the amputation of her magic, and especially the amputation of her creativity, sexuality, power, and wild inner force, in the hope that now she would finally have a place in the world, now she hopefully finally could be loved and accepted - it was just to discover that the man had lost all interest in her. For now she had become his version: Adapted, controlled and "nice". She had turned into a grey, shut down and withered version of a woman. She certainly did not provoke or challenge him any longer, however all sexual tension had been lost. And when a woman shuts down so much energy and has gone through so much trauma, it is also easy to develop chronic anger and become manipulative, toxic, and to build hard walls as a shield of protection in a cold world."
I believe these are facets many women today are more or less familiar with within themselves. For these are some of the psychological inherited dynamics in the collective female memory that still linger on deep subconscious levels in a lot of women.
And this is the dynamic, which has played out between men and women through several thousand years: War against the dark feminine aspects. While the amputated version of the woman is not able to maintain the interest from a man, which creates a dysfunctional dynamic between men and women: An eternal chain of longing, pain, betrayal and unfulfillment.
This is reflected in the mythology about Lilith, representing the repressed feminine in our collective subconscious. And this is exactly the aspect we need to heal and reintegrate in our psyche and our lives, especially as women.
Lilith stands for: Rebelliousness, freedom, creativity, passion, transformational sex, magic, firm boundaries, wisdom, truth, power, healing, savagery. She is magnetic and untamable.
And she is the medicin for every girl/woman who suffer from adjustment disorders, who are pleasers, and those who suffer from "nice girl syndrome".
The magical key to every woman's magic is her awareness of her own worth, that she knows her boundaries, and her connectedness to her inner wisdom (intuition), and that she acts accordingly, as well as giving herself room to unfold her very own unique creative expression, whether this is painting, lovemaking, writing, singing, creating family, doing gardening, dancing, dreaming or just being herself. Not for other people, but in the pure joy of presence and creation. For this is where her energy expands. When a woman unfolds her inner life, coming from her soul, she becomes magical. And her otherworldly beams will attract, captivate and fascinate men.
On the other hand, when a woman turns her back against her inner life, looses her faith in her own worth, shuts down her intuition and doesn't honor her boundaries, but instead dedicte herself to live the "outer life": buying into the idea that her worth is based on "firm breasts" and grading scales (other people`s validation), and she believes she has to go out into the world and prove her worth through outer achievements, then she will fall, and she will also wear herself out. Her magic will disappear because this will become her new reality. And in comparison to outer scales it will never be good enough; there will always be another woman who is better, more talented or more beautiful etc. Thus it will be an eternal hunt, and eternal dissatisfaction.
Women will benefit from running their lives on the basis that they know their worth. Rather than running their lives on the basis that they believe they need to prove themselves like men, or deserve their worth through outer achievements.
The woman possesses a beautiful and magical energy by the virtue of the contact she has to her inner being. This energy will outshine any physically beautiful woman or outside achievements. Because feminine magic from the beyond has a magical qualities, that no physical things can compare to. Each woman features her very own unique blueprint, and then there is no more competition, only peace, harmony, joy, satisfaction, gratitude and love, right where you are.
But she must believe it to be true.
Some important elements that a man can contribute with to a woman's life is leadership and safety. I know there will be a big outcry from certain women now. But a man who stands in his healthy masculine energy, can be that strong solid rock in a woman's life, that takes responsibility for overall control, direction and lifefoundation. He holds the energy for her and supports her.
It is not to undermine women, but rather to take the burdens off their shoulders, so that they can focus their energy on unfolding their creativity and femininity, and soften up, which is what makes women magical. Women are intimately connectet to their intuition, thus are usually very intelligent and sharp. For this reason a good man will always listen to her, but it will create a better dynamic in the relationship, if he has the overall responsibility for the final decisions. He will grow in his masculinity, and her admiration and respect for him will also grow. Of course it will only be men who have trained their healthy masculine path, who will be capable of such leadership, and who will be able to manage it in a responsible way.
A man who has neglected his healthy masculine path, will not be able to stand as a support in a woman's life. He will instead either run away, because he is scared of her power (what happens a lot today), or try to shut her down (what happened a lot in the past). Nor will he be able to make wise decisions, because he is not connectet to his inner light and guidance, so he fumbles around in life and will only be able to do damage to a woman. Together with such a man, a woman will become masculine, because she knows she can't lean back and be safe, therefore she will take over the control.
Vise versa, if a woman, who is trained to be in her masculine/hard energy, meets a man who stands in his healthy masculine energy, she quite possibly will feel the need to run away, too, because it will awaken vulnerability within her, which she is not used to. His masculinity will create a energetic field, that shines into her hidden feminine self. Which will make her feel shaky, especially if she hasn't healed her feminine self, and has a lot of walls build up from previous bad experiences.
Men and women need to heal themselves from the inside to create healthy and harmonious relationships with each other again. Competition between the sexes must stop. Instead they need to fall deeper into the healthy expression of their own sex, if the relationship with the opposite sex shall be filled with mutual respect, lasting attraction, love, harmony and tolerance.
